INTO THE NEW

I always love the last week of the year. The feeling of being “done”, of resting in what is and what has been, taking stock and sending that up with joy and appreciation, quietly tuning in to the frequency of what will come next. 

This morning I woke up early and came out to my still darkened living room. I looked around and felt such overflowing gratitude for all we’ve created over this last decade. It’s been a huge one for many of us. Reflecting all the way back to 2010, Joe and I both found and fought for brand new careers, riding the wings of focus and determination into the biggest arenas, where we both knew we wanted to play. We bought our first house and turned it into a home. We made a killer record together that we’re still so proud of today. We started our family - finally - legally adopting our daughter last October, after nearly ten years of wishing and praying for that to be. 

It hasn’t been an easy road, but it sure has been potent. I’m grateful for all of it, the heavy duty triumphs and tribulations. Most especially, I’m grateful for the people who have traveled with us through this chapter. The long conversations, the intimate coffee dates, the hikes and walks, the prayer and meditation, the sorting out and processing, the lessons unearthed. I will forever appreciate the time shared and support given.

True friends are a precious gift, and I feel compelled to specifically mention that I continue to be so blown away by the women in my tribe. My courageous, powerful, adventurous, curious, rock-solid, ever-searching, gorgeous female warriors. Sisters, we make the world go round!! (No disrespect, guys - we love you, too…But women…Women!)

I’ve been mulling over my new word for the coming year. Every January I choose a word that I will use as a touchstone, something I’m wanting to work with or invite more of into my life. Last year it was Alignment. As always, the universe gave me plenty of opportunities to try on that word and assess where I was in relation to it. So many people, places and things fell away from my life as I continually came back to the question: What am I aligned with? What does alignment truly look like for me? I’m happy to report that overall, I feel much more aligned with where I am, where I’m going, and what is in my life now. 

The word freedom has been knocking at my mental door for the coming year. It came to me about a week ago. I woke up and it just hit me. Freedom. I want more freedom. Freedom from negative thoughts, freedom from tension, inflammation and pain, freedom from the imprisonment of doubt, self-criticism and judgement, freedom from old baggage and outdated incarnations of myself that have bogged me down or stopped me in the past. Freedom to be self expressed, brave, IMPERFECT. Freedom to try. Freedom to fail…and to succeed.

I’m keenly aware that contrast is the great clarifier; calling in a word will naturally also invoke it’s opposite. I’ll need to work on creating more structure and better habits in my day to day existence…and I just might find myself digging out of (self-imposed) prison every now and again. (It’s okay, my nails are already dirty; I’ve got this!)

Recently, Joe came up with a metaphor for 2019 that has been so resonant, that I keep coming back to it. I’ll share it with you here. We were reviewing the year in one of those deep and dynamic conversations that’s totally unexpected and comes right before bed. He suggested that the whole of 2019 has been like pulling back on a giant bow and arrow. We just kept pulling back, back, back. You could feel the tension building. Every time we thought it was time to let go, it turned out it wasn’t yet; we’d discover there was more refining and tinkering to do. More calibration, more aiming, setting the target in the sights, the universe cooly whispering: Are you sure? Are you sure? Where, exactly, do you want to point this thing? The choice is yours. Choose wisely!

Then he said that in 2020, the arrow is finally going to be released. I totally feel it! Do you???

Happy New Year, everyone. I am wishing you joy and serenity as we move forward into the newness of 2020. May it bring 20/20 vision, many blessings and mad courage, which we will all need to keep pressing ahead, out of our comfort zones and into the next incarnation of the lives we imagine.

Here’s to releasing, readying and welcoming in sweet adventures with a big bold YES.